Things I have done to prepare for the First Birthday Party

  • Purchased an ungodly amount of plastic Elmo-ware sure to hasten the demise of the planet and choke the Pacific Gyre beginning July 27 th.
  • Made a donation to offset Liberal Guilt associated with Elmo-ware death to sea creatures.
  • Actively pursued the explosion of ToysRUs and Fisher Price in our home.
  • Dyed my Nightmare on Elm Street-esque grey streak that has developed this year as I feel it is inappropriate to celebrate the culmination of Max’s first year looking as though Freddy Kruger has scared the bejeezuz outta me. (even if he did.)
  • Had half the skin on my face ‘dermabraded‘ read: used a sander on my face in a vain (both meanings of the word, utter vanity and totally for naught) attempt to appear as if I have slept 1 of the 365 days since Baby Max arrived.
  • Baked Elmo’s head in the form of a cake.
  • Begged, pleaded and prayed for Elmo’s head to come out of the pan in one Elmo shaped piece.
  • Actually danced around the kitchen when Elmo’s head was successfully released from the pan.
  • Laughed at how honest to God pleased and proud of myself I was from this achievement.
  • Used all those fantastic make up skills learned from all my years of theatre to painstakingly turn Elmo from blank cake to frosty monster!
  • Thanked God that frosting, like make up, is forgiving.
  • Purchased a new outfit for me to wear to the party….yeah I know. Max doesn’t care.
  • New lip gloss may have snuck in there too.
  • I did resist the shoes….
  • Giggled as my husband put together the new play set for Max, and so it begins…
  • Wondered what on earth we will get him for Christmas! Surely we’ve purchased everything there is to get…
  • Oh! Looked at Fisher Price catalog and PBK, now have a new list for Christmas!
  • Realized happily how my priorities have changed since Baby Max has been born.
  • Decorated the house
  • Wished I could do more…
  • Wished for another year as happy and healthy as this one.
  • Held him close, and let him go as he takes his first wobbly steps towards two.
  • Love him. Love him. Love him.

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