I seem to have lost myself a bit. I know this is for certain because just three minutes ago my local NBC station announced that it is moving the Ellen Degeneres show to 3 p.m.
Hello??? That’s the same time that General Hospital is on ABC!! Whatever will I do! I love me some Ellen, but as I may have mentioned I am Ambassador to Port Charles! (Drowns in fictional ego boost)
I was for real and for true upset at this move and for a few minutes considered writing them a letter to give em a piece of my mommy brain addled mind! (I write a LOT of letters, I’m always penning some missive when, as Zach says I’ve been ‘notoriously wronged’. hmpf)
Not to mention that King Max loves Ellen, so depending on how late he sleeps in (in direct relation to how many time he is up at night) we either watch it and snack pre or post nap)
Shortly after being all upended by my tv listing time change, I thought…what.the.heck? (Lent!) Am I seriously upset about ELLEN? Who in the fickety frack am I? When oh when did I become such the stereotype of the SAHM? Now, not that it’s a BAD thing to be…but clearly reading back the last few posts I am indeed a pj wearing, no make up applying, daytime tv stay at home mom.
And when did that happen??
I thought about my past, the good parts and the bad. The crazy times with WWJD post college and the easy going lovin lifestyle we had pre-baby. The dinner parties, the shows I did, the auditions and of course…home sweet home, Los Angeles.
The King let out a barbaric yawp above the rooftops (okay fine, it was just a big dramatic yawn) and I hurried him down to the royal crib where he proceeded to not want to ‘Boo’ (nurse) but instead cuddled in my arms, giving me many, many kisses…most closed mouth and sweet but the occasional wet sloppy one snuck in there. He wiggled up in my arms and proceeded to tell me…I don’t know what, but it was VERY important and involved Daddy, Bob-Bob (grandpa) and fooball, Elmo and happy Mommy. (hey! At least I’m happy mommy!) it could have been a Shakespearean Soliloqy; it went on for ages, a good ten or so minutes and was basically awesome. Finally after one last big smack, he laid down to bed with a plaintive ‘Mommy’ rolled over and passed out.
And then I realized, oh! this is who I am now. It may be less glamorous than my previous life, I certainly have less need for earrings and stilettos, but more need for tickle fights and cuddles.