DUDES! One month!! We made it one whole month of keeping Baby2ElectricBoogaloo in the belleh!! I’m supah jazzed about this because, duh, 34 weeks is way safer than 30, know what I mean? Plus it’s looking like this kid is staying put for a while longer. I’m happy with that, although I gots to admit that I am getting way uncomfortable!
My contractions really seem to be slowing down, I even went three whole days without one! But at other times, Holy Infant of Prague it feels like a vice is just squeezing me corset style. Guess what? That hurts like the devil and makes me want to howl at the moon like those werewolves in Twilight. (p.s. watched Twilight the other day and why? Just why? Why is ONE supernatural dude in love with Boring Bella, much less two? She’s sullen, monosyllabic, and doesn’t even attempt to be nice to your vampire parents when they make Italian food!)
So with one month of keeping this kiddo in we have also reached ONE MONTH OF NO COFFEE!! I had to break up with coffee to keep this kiddo in, and it was so worth it. But it begs the question, do I chase the Green Mermaid (bucks) once I pop this kid out? Or stay clean and pure? And also, does this count as one miracle towards my sainthood? Miracle One…lives with mother in law and likes it. Miracle two…quit coffee. I think it it does.
Obviously the answer to the difficult coffee question is heck no! Once that epidural wears off someone bring me a Sugar Free Vanilla Soy latte STAT!
The Boss is suffering his own withdrawals. One month of broken boos. He asks every single day to nurse and every day I tell him the Doctor says the boos are broken and he responds “No I think he said they are fixed!” It makes me sad and happy all at the same time, and honestly I am kind of glad I never got to have that last boo-ing session, because I would have been a wreck. It was better this way, like the mean Russian woman who used to distract me with some outrageous statement before she ripped my lady biz hair free. I would never had willingly done it, but now it’s done oh hey! that’s great! So while I am pleased with the results of ripping off the boo-ing without warning, suddenly The Boss seems so…big. And cuddly! No one told me that he would get cuddlier! Mama likes.
I wonder when he will stop asking to nurse. And what sort of technicolor tantrum can we expect when he sees me boo the new baby? He is nothing if not dramatic.
No idea where he gets that from.