The Boss has an invisible friend. His name is Piss. Yeah, you heard right. For weeks TOTT and I kept saying “Pierce?” And the Boss would say “No! PISS!” as if we were the two stupidest humans he had ever dealt with, which very well might be the case. Sometimes Piss is very, very big. Sometimes he is tiny. Sometimes he plays guitar in the band and sometimes he plays bass. Sometimes he eats lunch with us, and sometimes he cuddles in bed with us as we read our good night books.
I always make sure to say hello to him and ask him how he is, once I am informed that he is in fact with us, as I am an adult and can no longer see the invisible friends of our little ones. Apparently my warm welcome has gone unappreciated.
One day while watching the stoners-are-now-making-tv-shows piece de resistance Yo Gabba Gabba The Boss gleefully squealed “There’s Piss! Piss is on TV!” Quickly I tuned in to what I had been trying to tune out just a split second ago and who do I see but Biz Markie. “OH!” I say “BIZZ!” and The Boss says “Yes! PISS!” in an all to annoyed teenager tone.
It’s true. My son’s invisible buddy is this cat right here:
For some reason I find this hilarious. My kid’s imaginary friend isn’t a big bunny, or a cartoon firefighter, but instead a rapper! Mostly I am thankful that the mystery of Piss has been solved! The Boss and Piss sometimes rap, they play guitar.
But no matter how many times I invite Piss to dinner it makes no difference. The Boss has informed me that Piss doesn’t like me. He likes Daddy and Huck. He likes grandma and grandpa….but not me.
Fine Piss. My imaginary friend doesn’t like you either!