Golden Globes Fashion Recap

Last night I co-hosted the Golden Globes live chat on iVillage. It was so much fun…so much fun that it made up for a rather, shall we say, blah show?

Was I the only one who was wondering when they were going to release the Gervais? I mean, why have him on and then essentially neuter him? Maybe next year, we can only hope.

Never mind that, because I got to chat fashion, beauty, and all things Hollywood with the best, the iVillage team. In my wildest dream they say Stephanie, Steph…can we call you Steph? We loved that. Come talk Hollywood, fashion and gossip on the regular with us. I think they should say that, don’t you? You can check out their Best and Worst Dressed here, but first let’s dish. Just you and me. Between friends. And real friends don’t hold back right?

First up. Angelina. She’s on everyone’s best dressed list but I am going to go the other way and say nope. I’m pretty sure that splash of crimson is an actual blood spatter from the ritual sacrifice of bunnies, or a Jennifer Anniston voodoo doll or something.

I want to like her, I try to like her, but I can’t quite…she’s so cold. There is zero question that the woman is exquisite. I want to feed her a burger (and I am a vegetarian) and get her to loosen up! I’d like to see what she is like with her kids, I bet there is a lovely side to her we don’t really see.

Claire Danes, again everyone loved it. I think it’s a little Star Trek Couture. The back was pretty cool. Maybe I just haven’t forgiven her for the whole Billy Crudup thing…I give it a B. p.s. if you aren’t watching Homeland you should, it’s the shizz.

 

Reese Witherspoon in Zac Posen. DAYUM!

I like to pretend that Reese is my friend and she lets me raid her closet regularly…oh! that I had somewhere to wear this. And that I could fit into it.

Charlize genetically engineered Theron

You have to be ten feet tall and weigh fifteen pounds to carry off a side embellishment like this, and she does. This? This is what couture Dior is all about. This right here. Take note Gwynnie, this is how you rock a pink gown. Per.Fect.Tion.

Natalie Portman. Not ten feet tall, but definitely fifteen pounds. Her baby was born shortly after Huck, so way to make me feel bad about myself Natalie! This color of this strapless Lanvin is lovely on her. Bonus! she has handy place to rest her drink as she works the room. I give it an eh…

 

Remember last year when I had to swallow all my pride and give Lea Michelle one of the best dressed. This year I’d like to thank her for this dress. Blanche wants it back for the Golden Girls Senior Pageant in Miami Beach.

But not even Juliana Marguilles (who is two for two in WTF dresses) looking like she wants to teach me disco pottery was the worst dressed.

Not even Sarah Michelle Gellar (and this one hurts people because I love me some SMG) who let her 2 year old pick out this disastrous tie dye gown is worst dressed. Sarah, this is why we are the parents; to guide our children into making good decision. So this is not only a fashion fail but a mom fail. (also Buffy for life!)

Worst Dresses is (for me anyway) Piper Perabo. Because what on God’s little green earth was this girl smoking when she took down the old sheer curtains and made this random see through gown complete with HOT PANTS.

Piper Perabo is a beautiful woman. Something is happening here, close up her eyelids look like they’ve been lifted, her lips plumped and everything generally tightened, and it’s not good tightened because she had nothing to tighten. Poor Piper.

Frieda Pinto is painfully beautiful. This skin, hair, necklace, color of the gown…divine. The fabric is looking a bit heavy in pics but it was light as air and flowed around her.

Runner up for best dressed is Viola Davis. This color, her hair, the cut of this dress is perfect for her body. It just shows everything that is gorgeous about this woman. And there is a lot of gorgeous going on with Viola.

Simple. Elegant. A+!

The winner of my almost but not quite award is Julie Bowen. This was exquisite. Her hair, everything was perfect….except the color. If only it had been any.other.color. Black, white, pink…but nudes were everywhere last night and it is so hard to pull off.

Jessica Alba. I’ll have what she’s having. “Jessica Alba glow’ actually trended on twitter.

The highlight of the whole evening for me was when Octavia Spencer won for The Help. I thought her portrayal of Minnie was very different from how she was described in the book, but I loved her. Loved Minnie. Loved Octavia Spencer. I also learned from her acceptance speech that my so-called waterproof mascara was in fact, not.

My Best Dressed? Charlize. Flat out, no questions. She is just…unreal.

Worst? Obvs. Piper.

I love the trend towards simple, old Hollywood glamor! Lots of red lips, finger waved hair, headbands.

What did you think? Am I wrong? Win me over. Except on Piper cause that ain’t never gonna happen.

11 thoughts on “Golden Globes Fashion Recap

  1. I agree with everything you said. Angelina is definitely stunning, but girlfriend looked SCARY w/ those slashes of red and the bright, shiny white and the pointy boobs and the scary-skinny arms. Yikes!

    My fave was Jessica Alba. She’s just too damn gorgeous. Didn’t she just have a baby, too?

    What about Jessica Biel? She gave Piper a run for her money with the washed-out, see-through, granny-pants look, I thought. She should’ve looked smokin’ hot — didn’t she just get engaged to JT? Finally?!

  2. I don’t watch awards, but I have to say, from your pictures, Jessica Alba wins hands down. And I’m in tears over Piper Perabo. What in the world? I’m going to have to revise my “list” because she’s been on it for years. I may need to reassess ๐Ÿ˜‰

  3. I 100% agree with you on Angelina and Claire Danes. WTF were those? Also, why is Angelina always so angry? She looked like she wanted to kill Seacrest when he interviewed her. I’m no Seacrest fan but come on.

    One of my favorites of the night that didn’t make your list was Reese Witherspoon.

  4. my comment about angelina when she walked in last night (i was watching some random feed on the web) was that i really think inside her head she is thinking “SUCKERS…” because she is just so damn expressionless.

    i want her to at least LAUGH one loud obnoxious throat cackle. or something? please??? something that makes me believe that she is truly human and not fashioned from parts made in those foreign countries that keep giving her babies so freely to adopt.

  5. First off – Thank you for the Angelina bit! SO spot on and I laughed my butt off!!! You are the first person to post images of Reese and SMG! WOW Reese looks amazing – but I wish she had done more with her hair. SMG… I can’t say bad things bout Buffy but I do question her child’s choice and hers as a mother ๐Ÿ˜‰ SUNNYDALE FOREVER!

  6. Could NOT agree more with you on Angelina and Claire, hated both of those dresses. ICK! And, I also agree on your assessment of Angelina as cold and needing a sandwhich….STAT! In fact, I pretty much agree with all of your thoughts and choices here. Charlize theron is unreal, and that dress on Juliana Margueliess, PAINFUL!!!!!

  7. I had a friend comment that she said Amanda Peet should be in jail for stealing Holly Hobby’s dress.
    I agree w/ Abby’s comment about Jessica Biel. It was table-clothy.

    Heidi Klum, who can look so beautiful in rags…why she chose that dress is beyond me. It did nothing for her chest (those ladies looked like they needed a real pick me up). And the color did nothing for her.

  8. Yeah I pretend like I’m friends with Reese Witherspoon too. One of my friends went to school with her so you know, I like pretend I did too. Nobody went to school with Natalie Portman but I adore her too.

    I’m with your picks and yes, Angelina must be fun loving somewhere but holy cow she is one scary lady all dressed up.

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