Monday Morning 9:37 am

After a long, and contentious discussion with The Boss about how we do not wear our pajamas to pre-school even if they are comfortable, I finally managed to get him dressed. And then promptly drove him to preschool. In my PJ’s. Well played Monday, well played.

Huck is working on all four incisors and two molars at once. Teething. The great baby design flaw.

Dear Monday, I’ll have a Super Big Gulp sized cocaine latte with an add shot of speed. And two Splendas please.Is there an app for that?

Monday? I cry UNCLE! I just want to snuggle in bed and watch Love Actually.

Oh yeah, I have kids. And they need, like, attention and food and stuff.

Crack latte it is! How was your weekend?

 

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Are you ready for some football?

I have been accused, on more than one occasion, of being a girly girl. Guilty. As. Charged. Which is SUPER great seeing as I am surrounded by boys. Even the cat is a boy. I am alone in girly ness in my household save for my über girly sister-in-law and mother-in-law, but most of the time it’s me and a bunch of boys.

Perhaps it may shock some of you who know of my penchant for ballet flats, white fluffy bedding, tiaras, and all things Scarlett O’Hara that I love sports. While I do love the boys of  summer, the boys of fall and the men of March Madness and have even loved a few of them, I have zero athletic ability of my own. I was the girl who was frequently ‘sick’ during gym class. I mean catch a ball? Gimme a break, that’s never gonna happen. And I mean it, I can’t even catch the ball when my sweet Boss throws it to me!

I’ve given up all hope of participating myself, but watching? Yes, please. I grew up with the sounds of John Elway and the Broncos as my weekend soundtrack and to this day just having football on the television makes me happy. Unless it’s the Cowboys or the Raiders and then it makes me stabby. I find now that I am surrounded by boys that weekend football is a whole new experience and I gotta say…I dig it. I dig the whole set up, nachos, grilling, chips, hanging out together, my kids half snuggling half acting out the game as it happens.

Then last year something happened, 3 years after moving to D.C. – I started REALLY caring how the Redskins did. Hail to the Redskins!  (although I do confess to sneaking on to Pinterest on the old iPhone sometimes during the games. Twitter too, I am addicted. BUT I tweet about the game so really I am just enjoying football with even more fans, right?)

I love Fall, I crave sweaters and leggings and cuddling up on the couch with my family and just relaxing. Football is the perfect reason to just stop everything and hang out together. And maybe make some veggie chili. Y’know how it is.

What about you? Do you like the Cowboys? If so, can we still be friends even though I think you are seriously misguided in your football love?

Make YOUR Game Day official with Pepsi ® and Tostitos ®Enter every day for a chance to win a CAR every week and a $50 NFL SHOP GIFT CARD every hour(See official rules.)

This is a sponsored post by Pepsi which is awesome because Pepsi was one of the four major food groups while I was in college. All opinions are my own; for instance the Cowboys stink. See? Pepsi absolutely in no way sanctions saying that the Cowboys suck, even though they do. Also, the Raiders. 

photo credit wikicommons 

 

Mom in Chief. That’s me.

Yesterday I won the gold medal in mom-dom. At least in the morning. We all woke up on time. Everyone ate breakfast. I got to drink my coffee while it was hot.I only had to threaten to take away baseball once. All children got dressed without fights. And I got to take a shower in the morning.  We made it to preschool on time and after we dropped Boss off, Huck made it quite clear he wanted a morning nap…so..

TIME TO MYSELF!

What to do with that. I had already showered (amazing, I cannot get over that. It’s the small victories, people) so I got my suburban mom on and clipped some coupons in anticipation of a trip to the mother ship. Target.

I know, you guys are like forget those awesome fashionable  Mormon mom blogs! Minky is where it’s at y’all. The excitement is palpable, non?

Then my Birthday Twin and sister in law sent me a text:
 It’s slightly sad the happiness I get from knowing that boot season is coming back

Ah, me too Kelly. Me too. Again, its the little things.

I wonder if I can find a coupon for boots? Because THAT would really tie things together.

So this happened…

You guys? I’m just…meh. Lately I am just meh. So blah I don’t even have a real word for it.  Meh. I’m not sure if it’s that my birthday is coming up and I’m feeling introspective as to what I have accomplished this year and how I’m not that much further along in finding a new career but am so much farther along in being comfortable as a mother and even farther along in slaying the dragon that is postpartum anxiety.

Note: Boss is obsessed with Mike the Knight so there’s a lot of dragon talk around the house lately.

Maybe it’s that I self inflicted some angst upon myself by taking the bull by the horns to find a place of our own, fell in love with a place, and then we decided to wait just a few more months and save some more money so we can decorate etc. The right decision, I know this, but just…ugh.  The place was small, only 932 sq. feet. But the moment I walked in I could SEE our life there, you know? And Max loved it. Boo was happily racing up and down the hall as fast as he could crawl and Zach was doing the big eyed head nod. You know the one; the this is good, we could do this but be cool about it. The woman who owned it? Well she loved us too. In fact before she leased it to someone else she checked back just one more time to make sure our sweet boys didn’t want to live there. There was even a yard. UGH!

But it’s the right choice. Soon, soon Pinterest will need more bandwith and you will all be subjected to countless how to make a rented space my own posts.

It’s still sticky hot here, but grey and sometimes rainy which breaks my brain as I think sweaters! boots! then I open the door and am hit by 90 degrees of hot humidity. But it is actually Fall and so school began for the Boss.

Yup. That about sums it up.

But then this happened and my heart exploded into a billion glittery pegacorns.

Boss had a blast at school and his face when he saw me at the end of the day was just heaven on earth.

Last night as we snuggled before bed he said “Mommy what’s under my skin? What am I made of?” I said “You are made of baseball, rock and roll, and vanilla milk.” He responded “I AM! I AM made of that!”

Maybe I am not so meh after all.

Newborn Memories

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Missing time. That’s what they call it when you can’t remember whole chunks of your life.

Missing.

I am missing much of the Boss’ first year and a half. Thanks postpartum anxiety. But the things I do remember, especially those things from the first few weeks before we moved, I remember  viscerally. It is as if they happened a few moments ago and the feelings linger the way you relive a good laugh at a dinner party.

The Boss was a good nurser, right from the start it was declared that he had a perfect latch and when the lactation specialist came to visit us on the second day of his momentous life Zach and I giggled at how she seemed almost pissed off that we really didn’t need her. The Boss was a natural and despite my training bra sized boobs so was I. I took this as a gift happily since pregnancy and birth were not easy journeys and so I relished the nursing. So natural. So precious. Plus? Perfect excuse to demand your baby back from whomever had absconded away with him for snuggles. And so it was that I sat in my living room, the LA sun streaming through the windows, rocking my baby and filled with anxiety nightmares that were unceasing but quieted while we nursed. His sweet smacking noises made my heart sing as he snuggled in on the left side. Isn’t that strange how babies prefer one side over the other? both my babies prefer to really relax on the left side. One tiny arm tucked under mine and the other, a tiny hand curled in a fist as he nursed away and I marveled at the tiny left foot that always found it’s way into my right hand. The toes so impossibly tiny. That beautiful pink skin, still slightly translucent and peeling. His toes pointed and flexed as he nursed and I folded my hand fully encompassing it. So delicate. So amazing.

Then both legs suddenly stick straight and you know what happened next…the filling of the drawers. The tiny foot relaxed in my gentle grasp and he shuddered a big sigh, falling into a deel happy sleep. Perfect rosebud lips glazed like a fresh Krispy Kreme. I sat there wondering what to do? Wake him and change what was surely a swampy diaper? Let him sleep? I rocked and pondered this all the while caressing that tiny foot.

And so it is now. When he is upset he crawls in my lap and somehow that little foot ends up in my hand. The Boss sleeps with me every night. I know I should be getting him into his own bed but I can’t bring myself to care. He would never sleep with me or near me as a baby and in the last six months he has begun snuggling up as close as he can. I store these snuggles like Frederick mouse stored colors for the winter knowing that sooner than I am ready for he will push off my snuggles and he no longer will toss a sleepy arm over me in the middle of the night. He won’t scootch so close to me he is practically on top of me. So I relish every moment, every single second of it. There will be years enough for him to sleep in his own room.

I wake sometimes in the middle of the night, holding that precious left foot – now significantly larger and no longer smelling like marshmallow but in my hand nonetheless. Do I seek it out? Does he? I don’t know.

I wonder if when he is grown up he will come home and plop a giant stinky left foot in his wife’s lap?

But for now that little foot is all mine.

Home again home again….

ah. we are home after a glorious weekend in Ohio to see our beautiful cousin Chelsea get married! I always hoped when I got married I would love my husband’s family and they would love me and this trip solidified the belief that we do love each other. It’s lovely to be with them and this was one exciting and tiring weekend!
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Chelsea, who clearly has infinite faith in me, asked me to be the official wedding photographer along with my father in law, Bob-Bob. I was so proud of myself I shot on manual the whole time. I studied hard so I wouldn’t disappoint her and I got some great shots! Some crap ones too…but let’s not discuss that, as those will never see the light of day. I’m learning more every day and the shots I take today are better than the ones from yesterday, this both thrills and annoys me as I see how I could have done things better.
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The day after the wedding we all dragged on over to cousin Jeff’s house for a pool party, it was the perfect way to come down from the wedding high. Boss got further swimming at this party than he did in 12 weeks of swim class! He had so much fun!
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and Huckleberry? Well, after a dip in the pool he did something unheard of for a little Boo…he took an impromptu nap on his Aunt Robin. So sweet.
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(she will hate that picture but I adore it. So sweet!)
We spent the next day with my Mother in Law’s family and the kids had SO much fun and patiently allowed me to take pictures of them while they played.
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We even attempted a picture of all of them at once.
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They had a glorious time playing together! Although poor Huck spent a lot of time like this:
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Soon enough buddy, soon enough.

Everyone needs about ten million naps and even more loads of laundry done, but we are glad to be home. And very soon we will be ready to go back!

in my little town

This weekend my father in law issued me a photo challenge. You know me, challenge ACCEPTED! The Venue: Eastern Market. I love Eastern Market, if you come to visit I’ll take you there. Great cheese, flowers, artisan jewelry…just about everything you could ever want. Including fresh handmade pop tarts.

I’m sorry, did you get that? FRESH HANDMADE POP TARTS.  The end.

Eastern Market was a great place to work on getting to know my new 60D, and pine for new 55mm lens. Photography ain’t cheap and I always have the ‘I wants” for something!Now I shall subject you to my pictures:

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Girls (1 of 1)

girl with parasol (1 of 1)  These were so delicious..
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puppy (1 of 1)
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So you see, if you come to DC I can promise you a good time. And if Eastern Market isn’t your thing I can at least hook you up with some snugs from this dude:
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Those snuggles are worth the trip alone, I promise.

The Dark Side.

The air has been hot and heavy. You don’t so much walk around in it as you struggle to push your way through it, thick as cream soup, calves burning from the heat radiating upwards from the cement. It’s miserable. It’s claustrophobic.
Sometimes I feel as if the house is collapsing around me. The walls get smaller and closer to me and the ceiling lowers with every breath I take until I am hunched over trying not to be suffocated. Usually that’s when I plan an escape. We pack a stroller and walk around the lake to feed some ducks and hit a playground. Or we head to the mall, the children’s play area both a haven and the 7th circle of hell simultaneously.
This week there was no escaping. We were home bound and at the mercy of the air conditioning repair men who turned up sweaty and scraggly, tattooed with lovely manners.

They smiled at the boys and called me ma’am.

Ouch.

Sometimes staying at home is a rough gig. Sometimes I’m lonely. Sometimes the only adult I speak with all day is a stranger-made-friend on twitter.
140 characters can sometimes save my sanity.

The boys were hot and cranky. Huckleberry is now mobile and into everything. Specifically everything Boss is into. A small brother on your imaginary baseball field can put a real damper on your game.
“watch out for Baboo!” I say for the 20 millionth time that day as the baseball bat swings quickly over his small head.
“see Mommy, it goes OVER him.”

We are Melting. Mentally, emotionally, physically. All of us, and there seems to be no escape. Sleep is impossible, fingers and toes feeling swollen, full of hot water, hard to bend. Cranky, wanting to find comfort in snuggles but burning up with each touch
Then this morning: rain.

The heatwave breaks and the air conditioner softly hums cooling our skin. The walls recede, the ceiling lifts and we can snuggle together once more. We can all breathe again.
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Finally we rest.

Hucklberry says “Is the gang all here?”

Huck Collageblog

Dude. It’s moved. It’s happened…and it feels good. There are still things I can’t figure out…like how to set up feedburner for the new URL which is making me batty! But I’ve got the weekend to figure that out. Hopefully. In the mean time here we are, positively melting from the heat and humidity, so much so that even when we are inside we lay around like slugs. The Boss vacillating between the sweetest angel ever and a holy terror. The other day we set a personal record of FOURTEEN time out. Fourteen people. Fourteen. Huckleberry is practicing his standing and falling (not to mention his stellar Smooth Criminal hat moves) and the one time we ventured out of the house to meet Brittany at the National Zoo some butthead stole my wallet.

I’m in a real swell mood lately, let me tell you.

But there are babies to cuddle and ice cream to eat, so really all is good in the hood.

If I could only figure out feedburner.

Don’t forget to enter the PishPosh Mommy wetbag giveaway! I’ll announce the winner on monday!

TOMORROW IS THE DAY!!

Whoohoo! It’s bittersweet, leaving this space. This space is where I came into my own. But for a while I’ve felt like this doesn’t fit. Like a favorite old sweater, it’s well loved and worn but just not quite right for me now. So tomorrow the brilliant @Japster will move me from here to my new internet home…Belle Reve. I am both excited and sad about it. I’ll still be Minky, I can’t change who I am and I don’t want too but a new internet home now and hopefully a new in real life home soon! Belle Reve. Beautiful Dream. It’s a good place to be…a good place to grow. Hope to see you there!
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**So exciting news, my very first Op-Ed is up on iVillage! I DO think women can have it all…do you?