Better late than never…right?

The Boss has a little message for you.

If you follow me on the twitter then you know that this has not exactly been the merriest of Christmases. Tomorrow I will sit down and write it all out, coherent style. But for now just know we are okay except that Huck had a couple seizures and I flashed a priest.

Merry Christmas Father Kelly.

Today I’ve got a bit of a post over at Just Be Enough and we are chatting about giving back at iVillage.

Miss your faces.

winner winner Elmo dinner & some happy.

Sometimes things just show up that make you smile. WWJD’s Christmas card this year is one of those things. In fact I asked her if I could share it with you because, even though you don’t know her maybe it will make you smile too. The real story here is her husband, whom I adore. I mean flat out adore. You know how you love your friend and think about what you would like for them in a partner and then it comes true?? That. In the last three years WWJD had kicked cancers ass before it kicked hers (literally goodbye colon cancer) and is now making Lupus and RA her bitch. Yeah, I said it. Because Janice never met a challenge she didn’t win. Plus she always has the cleanest house in the history of ever. She’s amazing. We used to joke that I needed a What Would Janice Do bracelet because I was such a dumbass when it came, in particular, to men.Hence her blog name WWJD.  I still sometimes think what WOULD Jancie do…and then I do that. It always turns out right. It’s only 100% annoying and helpful when she smiles her her eyes light up all evil genius like and she says “I’m always right!” Because she is.

But I digress. So yeah. This.

I died. Her husband is an outwardly controlled man. He is lovely and friendly and wonderful…but a public goofball? Not so much. Me and Janice? Oh yeah. But Hubs? nope. So when this came in the mail I laughed until I wept and then I promptly hung it up because it just gives me a dose of Holiday Cheer. Also, check out my GORGEOUS Godson. God, I love that kid to the moon and back.


Oh, perhaps you swung by to see who is going to Sesame Place!  Duh duh duh duh!
sesame giveaway
Comment 31 is Cat From Breakfast to Bed! Email me all your deets so I can get you the hook up!

Christmas on the Potomac

We watch Madagascar and Madagascar 2 so frequently that  I have them memorized and sometimes King Julian makes bizarre appearances in my dreams telling me to move it, move it. When we were at Abbey Road on the River at the Gaylord I saw the sign for Madagascar ICE and I thought oh we HAVE to do that. Then I confess I thought, oh please let them do a blogger event! And they did. Hooray! I RSVP’d to that Momzshare evite faster than you can say Save Us Melman.

It was cooler than I had imagined. (get it, cause it was ice?) The day started off with cookie and Shrek green milk in the Belvedere Lounge. TOTT was grateful there was coffee and I patiently explained that there would always be coffee at blogging events. Always.

Huckleberry was immediately confiscated by Jodifur.

Suddenly down in the lobby we saw Shrek! All the kids raced to the balcony to see him, giggling with excitement as they caught glimpses of Kung Fu Panda as well. (Someone might have squeaked when she saw Mort. That someone might have been The Boss’s mother. Someone loves Mort.)

There were more giggles and squeals of joy when the kids were told they were all going to meet Shrek and all his friends! We headed down and took a million pictures.

I totally stole Huck’s Shrek ears. Don’t tell him.

We didn’t get to do The Puss in Boots scavenger hunt but a bunch of other bloggers did and said it was a blast!

From there it was on to ICE! Featuring Merry Madagascar…sooooooooooooooooo cold. Just as you would assume a giant tent with 250 bazillion tons of ice would be. We all bundled up and then they gave us extra parkas. Cause ice is cold, you. Word of advice: all small people look alike in blue parkas, I would suggest you attach a scarf or hat or something so that you can identify your tiny person and they can identify you. The ice sculptures are incredible, the artistry is really amazing. There is ice skating and hot cocoa (spring for the warm cinnamon almonds, trust me)

The Boss was getting pretty tired at this point but we pressed on because I was promised a Christmas Tree lighting and snow. Don’t mess with me people. Mama loves her some Christmas.

The BEST seat for the show is right in front of the fountain and you know my booty was there front and center. Boss took a quick snooze while we waited for the show. Now, I know that maybe if you don’t have kids a bunch of costumed characters doing a dance might not be a ‘show’ to you, but I am telling you right here and now the real show is the kids. Watching their faces light up is just true magic. Also Alex gave me a high five so that was pretty bad ass too. (the highlight for me was the Gaylord Employees…they had a whole routine down for each song and were just having so much fun! Every time we go the staff there is just amazing and they all really seem to be having fun with this)

I am not going to lie, the price is a bit steep (kids under 3 are free) but it was a BLAST. The National Harbor is one of my favorite areas around I just love wandering around there, it is all lit up for the holidays and just kinda romantical.I wonder how they’ll top it next year.

**My family attended ICE! as guests of the Gaylord and MOMZSHARE. All opinions are mine and mine alone.

Sum Up Vol. one

This week we were singing along with the Holiday tunes on the radio in the car. The Boss growing ever frustrated that he did not know the words, waited patiently for a break in the song and then sang out “TODAY!” you know, like 588-2300 Empire TODAY.  He slays me.

He and Huckleberry hold hands now. He lines his Smurfs up so they hold hands too.

He is growing like a weed and everyday he is bigger and smarter than the day before, but when he really wants something he still signs ‘more’ just like he did when we was very little. My heart swoons at that.

He is incredibly snuggly in the morning. He thinks that sitting on his potty is the perfect place for some cereal. He takes time out of his busy schedule to make sure I know just where the Starbucks is.

Huckleberry is six months old today. How did this happen?Clear proof that time is not constant. Six months when you’re pregnant lasts an age. Six months of baby love is a blink of an eye. He is teething. It sucks. He can almost sit up and I no longer keep him in his car seat but take him out and put him in the shopping cart and stroller. So big! He is very patient with my tiny shoes for Huckie obsession. He looks at me with stars in his eyes, watching me wherever I go. But The Boss is his favorite.

Favorite memory this week: Boss got a Buzz and Woody punching bopper bag (or whatever you call em, you know what I mean right?) after a particularly successful potty training day and he was punching it and cracking himself up. Huck started laughing, not just a giggle or two but a full on laughing fit. This only made The Boss amp it up and honestly we encouraged him and soon the room was filled with the joyful shrieks of the big brother and the hysterical laughter of the little brother.

Please let me hear that often. It’s good for what ails me.

Crazy sleep habits of toddlers


Screamed he who immediately passed out pants-less on the ottoman.

God, I love that kid.

What’s on the docket for you guys this weekend? We have two days jam-packed with soccer and ornament decorating and then on Sunday we are going to blow the Boss’s mind by taking him to Christmas on the Potomac and ICE. Dude. They light a Christmas tree and it snows. Plus, Madagascar. So, prepare for many videos of the Boss saying “I’m Alex. The Alex”

It’s going to be EPIC y’all!!!

Now, what to wear?


You know when you need coffee so badly that you forget to put the cup under the Kuerig while brewing said cup of coffee?


You know when you buy new pillowcases for your bed because you just LOVE the pattern then realize it’s the same pattern as your blog background?

You know when your puppy is all warm from the sun and smells like corn chips?
Puppy Bear


You know when you are jealous of a fictional female Smurf and the undying love she inspires in your three year old son so you buy a Smurfette shirt in the girls department at Old Navy even though you don’t really believe in character clothing, especially for adults, but you are hoping it will make your sick three year old smile and maybe look at you with the adoration he saves for a damn blue stuffed Smurf?smurf



You know when you love all your blog friends and hope they have an awesome weekend and post oodles of pictures of their precious children in their Halloween costumes on their own blogs?

max Lightyear



She’s one bad mutha- shut your mouth!

My mother likes to tell this one story about me, age 4, and I can see it clear as day. Where I was standing and exactly what happened. Perhaps I don’t actually remember it so much as she has told it so many times that it’s burned in my brain and so it’s a bit like a movie to me.

It goes like this:

My mother was fixing the toilet. Not just plunging, but crawling behind the toilet turning off the water and using a wrench. She turns to me and says “Stephie, come here I want to show you how to do this so when you’re older you’ll know.”

And I said “Mommy, don’t be silly. I will have a husband. That’s what they’re for!”

Okay, first of all I’d like to reach back through time and smack lil Stephie ten ways till Sunday, cause hello? Nice sensitivity little one. My father had only been dead about 1.5-2 years at that point and I am quite sure the wound of not having him around was still very raw for her. And second…it doesn’t matter if you do indeed have a husband. Ten times outta twenty momma is fixing that potty, am I right?

The point is that even with my resistance to self reliance and an incredible princess complex, my bad ass do it yourself mom taught me to be a bad ass do it yourself mom.

Need shelves hung? I can do it. Move a couch? Why wait till they guys get home, I will drag that bad boy into the next room for ya! Not to mention painting, spackling and yes…yes, turning off the water and fixing the damn toilet. And all of that is due to my mom,who solo parented a kid who – let’s be honest- was not exactly and easy one. Oh, I was great until I turned 13 and then I became evil devil spawn drama teen with a heavy dose of Daddy Issues. A lesser woman would have folded when I totalled the car less than 24 hours after getting my driver’s license. I won’t even pretend that lovely comment while my mother was acting like a plumber was the only insensitive thing I ever said to her. Most were unintentional, but there were some doozies that I spouted off on purpose that to this day make me cringe.

Or how about the time she hocked her wedding ring to buy my cheerleading uniform and then I got kicked off the squad? Well, actually it’s even worse…I just got suspended but I was so pissed offt hat they dared to suspend me that I just never went back. (FTR I later replaced the ring with a really beautiful gold and peridot ring, her birthstone, but still…really young Stephie?REALLY???)

Because of my mom I can do all these things…oh yes, I do have a husband and yes he does help. TOTT is great. But  I am my mother’s daughter and the menfolk, they drag their heels sometimes, non?  Or he is off at that pesky work thing he does and I am – how to say- IMPATIENT! so sometimes I just gotta do what I gotta do.

She taught me how to be self sufficient and one of the hardest lessons I’ve had to learn it to let TOTT in, to be my team mate. Because my mother was a team of one. And so was I. She and I against the world and all that!

She taught me how to mix Target with Neiman’s…before Target was cool. We didn’t have much money but I always looked like we did. Our house always did. She influenced me to spend money on the basics and bargain shop the trends. She encouraged me to have my own style.How she managed to let me go to school with long beaded ribbons pinned in my bowl cut hair and a dress with a pinafore over it and go go boots I’ll never know. 2nd grade was a Gaga fashion show for sure!

She also taught me unconditional love. She loved me wholly and completely even when I resembled a demon in a teenage body.

She rocks.

To me she is the best mom in the land. Happy Mother’s day Mumsy! I think I’ll use some power tools and then redecorate something.


p.s. I forgive you for blaming things the dogs did on me and for sometimes calling me Nym/Shelley/Barney/Pepper/STEPHIE!! and you forgive me for being evil and selfish? Okay? OKAY??

An Interview with The Boss…. HAPPY EASTER!

In case you’ve ever wondered about the mysterious Easter Bunny, The Boss spills the beans. (jelly?)

Few of you know this…but TOTT and I almost didn’t get married. It’s true. We almost never met, never fell in love, he almost never proposed, we almost never had a ceremony at the beautiful Mission Inn, we almost never had Max.

Because TOTT almost fell prey to this evil, obviously some sort of predator that Chris Hanson should bust for something Easter Bunny.

Seriously. Easter Bunny of Death.

Valentine’s Schmalentines.

Nothing says I love you like a cheesy gif!

{photo sourceMySpace. No joke}

It’s that time of year again, where high school girls wait desperately for a balloon or cookie to be delivered during class, hoping against hope that it’s from the cute boy they like and not the dork that skeeves them out.

Actually a visit from that super cute student council brat bringing those cookies is welcome no matter who payed the buck to send it, right? You can always lie about who wrote the note. But zero visits? Tragedy.

And then there’s Hallmark and jewelers everywhere convincing you that you neeeeeeeeeeeeeeed those little puppies that sing to each other and a schmaltzy card and your man? doesn’t really care unless he gets you that perfect diamond. And yet, even with all the influence and indoctrination of flowers, candy and jewelry men still manage to screw the pooch on Valentine’s day. (until you’re married for ages and totally count it as a romantic date if he will willingly take you to a chick flick and cold stone afterwards)

I myself have a long and storied history with Feb 14. And that’s because I have a long and storied history of dating losers. And on Valentine’s Day they seem to bring out the crazy. And while I totally was thrilled to receive one guys Letterman’s jacket (when I was 25 for Pete’s sake!) I must say, that the gift that sticks with me has to be a shower head.

I know what you’re asking yourself, was it a fancy rain head shower? Could you program it to your ipod so it water dances with the music? Did it massage like Phillipe the swiss massuere at Burke Williams? The answer to your queries would be no. No, it was your standard 5 buck comes with the apartment issue shower head.

{so bad I couldn’t even find a picture except on a demolition website}

Oh! But it did come with a water proof radio! So…..yay!

Seriously, worst present ever.

This Valentine’s Day I will be on the doctor’s table for the echo ultrasound on the littlest member of our family, and good news about his heart? Seriously, BEST present ever.

I got a huge kick outta my fellow iVoices interviews on the worst gifts they ever received.

What was your worst gift? And did it come with a shower radio? Inquiring minds want to know.

And Happy Valentine’s to you all!